Counting My Blessings

Last month something bad happened to us. Well, it's happened to a lot of people over the past couple of years - but it happened to us....again. My husband's job was eliminated. Did I mention that this has happened a lot to us over the past few years? He is in sales, so job cuts are something that we are (unfortunately) used to.

Job loss never comes at a good time, but we are in the process of building a new house. Back in early December when I learned that my husband would not have a job at the end of the month, I was so pessimistic. I constantly whined that he would never have a job in time, that we weren't going to move into the house that we have been working so hard to afford. I would (and still am) praying fervently that he would find a job in time.

One morning while I was praying, something hit me. Well, not literally, but you get the idea. I heard this voice that said, "Kim, quit whining about what you don't have and what you can't control and start being thankful for what you do have!"

Then I started thinking about it. Here I am worrying about what I can't control, and I'm not thanking God for my blessings.

And boy, do I have a lot of wonderful, wonderful blessings! I have a wonderful husband who I have known for 20 years this June. We have been married for 15 years, and will celebrate our 16th wedding anniversary this June. He is my best friend, and love him more than I can imagine.

I have 4 healthy, beautiful, smart children. They are my heart and my joy. I love my kids with everything I am. I read so many different blogs, many of which tell stories of the loss of their precious babies, or sick children. I am so blessed that I can blog about the funny things one of my kids said, or their accomplishments in school or on the ball field. We don't have to worry about doctors' visits or trips to the hospital. I am so blessed.

I have a home. No, it's not the house that fits all our needs (is there such a thing?) but it's clean, it keeps us warm, and it suits us for now. Do I still hope and pray that the house we are building right now will be ours? Yes, most definitely. But will it be the end of the world if it doesn't happen? Nope. We will survive.

I have a job that I enjoy. So even in the scary midst of unemployment, I know that I have a stable, secure job that I will go to each day.

This positive change of heart has done wonders for me and for my husband. I am still praying every day - all the time - for him to find a great new job that fits him, but I am making sure that along with those prayers, I am remembering to thank God for all the wonderful blessings that I have in my life.

It's been far too long since my last post. In fact, one of my new year's resolutions is to devote more time to this blog. I am not doing it for anyone out there who might be reading this, but more so for me because I have so much going on inside my head that I have to get out.

I used to write in my diary. A lot! In fact, I cringe to think what might have happened with those diaries of long ago. There is one inside my bedside table as I write this, and if my kids ever saw it - yikes!

Once upon a time, I would write when I wanted to get pregnant. I would write about my desires to have a baby, about my cycles, gripe about my mother in law, etc... Now, my baby making days are probably behind me, but I don't want that to be a reason for me not to write.

So a lot has been going on in our life lately. We started building a house! Very exciting, right? Well, not exactly. As I write this, our loan for the house has not even been approved yet. They have already framed the house. Mike and I toured the house today and it was fun to go through the house and point out where things would go in the different rooms of the house. Of course, I'm guarded, because I know there's that possibility that things could fall through.

So what else is going on in our life? Well, unfortunately, Mike was laid off from his job. I hate this because it has happened so many times in the past several years. It's never a good time to lose a job, but explain to me why companies feel the need to let a person go right before Christmas. I have hopes for him to find a job very soon, but the ball is in someone else's court right now. Did I mention that I absolutely hate to be out of control?

I have been praying like crazy for him to get a new job soon. I have been asking others to join in and pray with us for him to find a new job. He has a few leads so far, but everyone wants to wait until after the first of the year to make any decisions. It's so hard to be patient! I know that God has a plan for us, but quite honestly, I sure wish He'd hurry up and reveal His plans to us!

So it's a new year and there is a blank book in front of us, just waiting to be filled. So what do I want to accomplish in this new year and decade?

• To be a better wife. Mike gives so much to me, and I feel like I don't give as much as I take. My husband is the best, and I want him to know this every single day!
• To be a better mom. To enjoy every moment with my kids.
• To be the teacher to my students that I expect for my kids.
• To be a better homemaker. I like to think that I'm an organized person in a lazy person's body!

So it's out there. I am going to need help out there for anyone who may possibly read this to hold me accountable.

Happy New Year to all!